dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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