My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
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