i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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