you would pick up someone in the library
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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