don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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