I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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