It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize