Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
