I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Randomize
