He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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