everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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