I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
