HIV tests are more positive than that guy
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
