So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
