I skipped work to stalk him.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
