i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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