So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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