Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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