I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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