Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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