Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Bring me that man meat
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Randomize
