So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
