Joe is yelling at the trees again.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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