My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize