I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
