Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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