Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
