Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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