Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
