I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
