yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
