White coat. Heels.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I need water and some morals
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
