it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
