Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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