whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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