I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize