I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
you would pick up someone in the library
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
