he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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