I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize
