I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
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