I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I cannot find my penis.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
