I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
