Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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