Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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