if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
