I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I love having hate sex.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
