he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
