Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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