RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
