She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
